Here are some photos of our meandering around the neighborhood this morning.

New food discovery: red carrots! Similar taste--crunchy and sweet.

And the last one is our 4x4' lawn being mowed.

The photo of Hannah w/small round object at her feet is to show what obstructed my path when running a while ago... my downfall.

Hanging in there

Just a quick note to say that we're hanging in there. It's been a somewhat stressful last couple of days w/household help relations and the kids (and me) having a tough time (emotionally). We're trying to figure out some schooling and schedule options. We would be grateful for your prayers for wisdom and guidance as we navigate this issue.

We've met a couple of friends. Our neighborhood is very international. I've heard German, Spanish, French, Hindi and a variety of Nordic languages that I can't distinguish from one another. We attended a play group at a lovely Dutch woman's home today; in attendance were a Finn, a Brit and myself. Most of the English we hear here sounds little like ours. :)

Our internet has been in and out, so I haven't been able to be in touch as much as I would like at times.

The reality of life here (vs. an extended vacation--as the swaying palm trees might fool us to believe) is beginning to sink in.

Shae is LOVING his job and really enjoying the new opportunities, his team and his boss. I asked him to write soon on the blog to give you the dish.

The Indian head bob

I mentioned this in the last post re: Raj, but it really deserves a post all its own. Here's a good description I found:


the fabulous indian head bob

In India, if a person shakes their head from side to side, it means “no”. If a person nods their head up and down it means “yes”. This is all pretty familiar, no? But here there is a spectacular third possibility. It is called the Indian head bob. It is achieved by the smooth and undulating weaving of the head from side to side. A “sinuous back-and-forth-up-and-down-at-the-same-time movement, as smoothly as if the head rested on ball-bearings”.

This bob possesses a myriad of meanings. It can mean “yes”. It can mean “OK”, “Great”, or “I guess so”. It can mean “Sure” or “Eh, why not?”. If exhibited while another person is speaking, it can also mean “I'm listening” or “I understand” or “I appreciate the meaning of what you are saying, even though I don't necessarily agree with you”. I have also come to learn that it can sometimes mean "OK, you crazy American. Whatever". (http://www.aforadventure.com/headbob.html)

And to expound: (http://colorblindcupid.wordpress.com/2007/12/06/the-indian-head-bob/)

The head bob can be used to convey all kinds of messages, from the simple to complex:

Yes

No

I don’t know

Okay - I hear you. Keep going.

I’m listening

I totally disagree with that

You’re pissing me off, but I’m not ready to fight with you quite yet [otherwise known as the angry head bob]

I’m not so sure about that

I totally don’t like that idea, but I don’t want to have to give a reason why

That was kind of funny, but not funny enough to actually laugh

That wasn’t really funny, but you get a courtesy bob so you’re not embarrassed by your bad joke

I hear what you want me to do, but no way am I going to do that, so I’m just going to bob and maybe you’ll shut up about it

I’m bored now, but if I keep bobbing, the person talking to me may not notice I’m not paying attention to anything they’re saying [I so wish I could adopt this one sometimes!]

As the answer to “Why didn’t you vacuum today? I asked you to do one thing, and you didn’t vacuum? Why not?” [or insert whatever honey-do chore you like there]

Our helpers: part two

I haven't written more about our help over the last few days because, as I briefly mentioned in the last post, it has been the most stressful part of my time here so far. Shae had a sit down talk today with Raj, our cook/househelper. I think a combination of differences in language, culture, expectations, and temperaments has provided opportunities for conflict. We suggested a trial period and detailed our expectations explicitly.

This is my initial description of Raj & Florence. It hasn't worked well having their daughter in our house, so we're hoping for different arrangement.

2) Raj & Florence, and their 10-month-old daughter Andrea Madonna. They are our house helpers, a married couple in their 40’s? They cook (lunch/dinner) and clean for us and have cared for the children of other families they worked for. Raj’s English is somewhat limited and Florence speaks virtually no English. I think the only word she knows is “fine” (in response to being asked how she is doing today ). The language barrier makes deeper communication more challenging… and amusing. They come around 10-11am and leave around 3pm.

They have been very attentive to our likes and dislikes, asking lots of questions, eager to please. Sometimes this can be trying. And if you say you like or dislike something, “I will make everyday, madam, everyday I make it.” Or “I will not do again, madam.” It’s odd to be “madam” and to have my wishes become law. I am eager to learn from Raj in the kitchen and be the student, not the one in charge. I showed him by recipe binder, in which he wasn’t the least bit interested, but he promised to show me everything I want to learn. “You get a pencil, madam, and write it all down for your book.”

One of the most notable things about Raj is the HEAD BOB. It is still a little disconcerting and confusing at times, but we're getting used to it. :)

Chapatis in action

Wasn't able to add this to the last entry:



Pardon the last part of the video...Matthew jumped into my arms as I was taping!

Chapati

Raju, our driver, making chapati with the kids.

The land of spicy ketchup

So, I was once sent an e-mail list of 20 ways you know you're from Minnesota. My favorite: if you think ketchup is spicy.

Well, we're not in MN anymore. I bought some ketchup for the kiddos and intentionally chose the kind that says "NO ONION, NO GARLIC". Matthew took one bite and started crying. Poor kid. It was a little spicy. I'll keep trying.

Last night Hannah said, "Mommy, I don't want any more India food, Mommy. Can you just give me Minnesota food?" She was pretty tired. We had apples and peanut butter for dinner.

Our first dinner out

Shae and I had a lovely dinner at a restaurant at the clubhouse in Palm Meadows this evening. I wish I could offer a more thorough account for what we ate, but I still haven't wrapped my brain around all the long titles of the dishes. We had delicious garlic naan, some amazingly marinated vegetables and chicken cooked in a Tandoori oven and served with a mint chutney. We also had some tender, flavorful lamb in a curry gravy. Oh so good. Finished with a little roasted pineapple topped with saffron ice cream for dessert. Wow. And the price was wonderfully reasonable, like a dinner out at a casual restaurant like Chili's.

One of the funnier moments of the dinner involved a plate w/raw vegetable condiments: tomato, cucumber, red onion and a long, slender green stalk... which Shae, not unreasonably, assumed was a green bean and began to munch. To quote him, "I realized there weren't any beans inside, but little white flakes (seeds)...and I asked myself, 'What the heck did I just put in my mouth'?????" It was a very hot pepper masquerading as a green bean. And, yes, he did end up spitting it into his napkin. :)

Afternoon activity

This was a few days ago right in our driveway (just the length of a car). It's our gardener who's up in that tree! They have to cut branches that are old and could fall and make sure no coconuts are ready to drop. Apparently, the branches can take off a side mirror!

Coconuts are dangerous in many ways. My knee injury (road rash) is slowly healing but it still pretty ugly and a little painful. I saw a friend on my run this morning and was kindly reminded to "watch out for those coconuts."

Check out our photo site for more pictures of the event and Hannah drinking coconut water. She wasn't to keen on it; Matthew loved it.

Help: Part One

When asked what I was most looking forward to about our move to India, I replied, “Household help, to be honest.”

And honestly, that’s been the best and most challenging part of our short time here so far. I am grateful for the assistance, and in need of it: things take much longer to do, the time-saving devices we’re accustomed to in the US are either unavailable or not as dependable here. I also need help at times navigating the cultural differences, having someone who speaks one of 4 languages used communicate what I’m trying to say…

Our helpers are: 1) Raju, the driver (official job, which includes being available up to 14 hours a day, 6 days a week; he takes Shae to work and picks him up, and is available to me & the kids in the interim.) I’ve written a bit about him so far. He’s the youngest of 4 kids (a delightful, social baby of the family; funny like my sister), he’s married and has an 8-month-old daughter. We hope to meet his family next month when they return from the village. He grew up in Bangalore, knows the city very well. His English is the best of our helpers, though we still have a few misunderstandings/puzzled looks every day. He thinks WE speak too fast. Ha ha. In addition to English, he speaks Hindi, Kannada (language of the state of Karnataka, where we live) and some Tamil. He is Hindu. Hannah loves the shiny golden Ganesh (elephant god) on his dashboard.

He has been an ENORMOUS help in running errands and finding the things we need for our home. He not only takes us there (no street signs), but helps us make the purchases and/or bargain if we need it. I really feel like he is an ally—not to suggest an advesarial relationship between us as expats and the Indian world, but perhaps us as obvious newbie foreigners trying to adjust to a radically different world (I feel so much like a freshman again)… his is a face of compassion towards us. Though he does laugh at us often, too. Usually with us. You should have seen him laugh at my passport photo, “Not a very good photo, madam.” He calls Matthew “Matthew-baba” (like Ali Baba). He kisses the children every morning when he greets them.

Traveling photos

Having trouble uploading photos to Blogger... will post on our photo site: www.mccowens.smugmug.com (e-mail me for password if you need it: lisa_mccowen@hotmail.com)

Here are a few pics of the lovely lounge in Chicago and then the kids at breakfast at the Taj Residency, our hotel in Bangalore.






Having trouble uploading photos to Blogger... will post on our photo site: www.mccowens.smugmug.com (e-mail me for password if you need it: lisa_mccowen@hotmail.com)

Culinary delights

A brief overview... more to come. Our cook, Raj, shooed me out of the kitchen saying, "Madam, this week we are very busy. Next week I show you each dish."

- Fantastic fruits and vegetables--cheap, cheap, cheap!: carrots, tomatoes, cauliflower, snow peas, cucumbers, tangerines, apples (surprisingly!), grapes, Matthew's favorite and oft requested: PINEAPPLE, pomegranates

- Fresh juices: pineapple, sweet lime (I asked for no sugar in mine and Raj obliged me the first day. The next day he explained that the lime needed some sugar but assured me he only added 40% sugar to mine. :))

- Skim milk and yogurt are available everywhere. Yay for having made my kids eat plain yogurt w/honey for their short little lives. This has eased the transition.

- Rice. Our cook likes Korean rice.

- Dal. Many kinds. My favorite thing so far.

- Delicious rice salad (cold), w/ yogurt, cilantro and pomegranate.

- Beef w/chili powder. Matthew cried. Shae ate it!

- Potato salad w/cilantro, boiled eggs and radish (long, white, cooked ones)

- Delicious and entirely-too-rich beet salad concoction. I dared to ask what was in it: "beetroot, butter, cream and a little cheese"

So far, we've asked the kids to try 1 new thing at each meal. They haven't really eaten more than a bite. I am discouraged but trying to stay upbeat and emphasize my own enjoyment. And I'm buying lots of eggs (only a few rupees a piece) and yogurt... their comfort foods.

Will write more about shopping and what's available later.

Quick poll: what would YOU consider an outrageous price for Cheerios?

What happened to your knee?

Well, I tripped on a coconut. I wish I had a better story. The other expats laughed when I told them and said, "You have to put that on a blog!"

Rocking out to my ipod on a run in the lovely, cool morning. Running down a street that hadn't been swept in a while... it was a very small one. Yep. I'll spare you a picture (would be too graphic) b/c I don't have our camera/computer cord yet.

I can't feel too sorry for myself (mostly just embarassed) b/c it has been such a pleasure to have time to run w/o kiddos in the mornings.

FINALLY back online

Saturday, 2/14 Happy Valentine's Day

Just a quick note to say that we've been w/o internet this week, not because it's not ready and waiting in our house, but because our *new* computer has presented problem after problem. It's now been rebooted (completely erased) and is working w/internet but the wireless router has yet to cooperate (to enable Vonage phone).

We have much to share... hope to write more soon. Just wanted to let you know why your comments and e-mails have gone unanswered. THANK YOU for your comments, Leah, Julie, Natalie, Jen and Rachael!

Did any one watch the traffic video on the traffic post?
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We are doing fine. We're all a little tired, but happy to report that both kids slept through the night last night. What a mercy. Jet lag is for the birds!

We weren't able to get our air shipment as we hoped... so we're still kind of camping with clothes, sheets and towels... some furniture, some kitchen items. The same 10 books for 8 days now. I think that's been the hardest part. :)

The nitty gritty

Note: please don't feel obliged to read all the posts on this blog. Read only what interests you. :) This post is for those who've e-mailed wondering about the nitty gritty details...

Sleeping: has been challenging. This past night was the best, with only 2.5 hour awake time in the middle of the night. Previous nights saw 3 or 4 hours of awake time, and even room service at 3:30am. We tried everything--the family bed, songs, stories, music, you name it... no sleeping. And then waking each other up (H&M). There were a few parenting moments not to be proud of. Overall, we're hanging in there. We've napped as a family in the afternoons and gone to bed early.

We spent both afternoons this weekend outside, playing at the park and swimming. We're hoping that will help the kiddos adjust. Any other tips? We've read sunshine, sleep when tired, etc.

When computer/camera cord comes, will post a great pic of the kids cashed out in the car. For those of you who know our kids, VERY unusual.

Eating: So far only Matthew has lost a meal. The food at the hotel is very friendly to western appetites and we have stayed pretty plain and safe. My ventures at the buffet have included baked yogurt (awesome) and breakfast porridge. Lichee yogurt didn't go over well. Fresh fruit juices (probably not safe) are delicious. We're still supplementing w/granola bars on occasion (3am).

One funny note is that we get MORE bottles of water every time our room is cleaned. The last count was 13. They must think we're bathing with it! :)

Digestion: we're friends with the pepto tablets. They help keep the tummy rumbles in check. That's all to report so far. No famed "Bangalore belly" yet.

McDonald's in India

We had 1/2 an hour to grab some dinner while waiting for passport photos to be developed (needed 15 more for paperwork here), so we headed to McD's as a treat for the kids. Saying "french fries" was the only way we were able to get Matthew to smile for the photo.

You know you're in India when...

1. there's no beef on the menu
2. the license for the kid's menu toy is outdated by 3 years (figures from a movie that came out 3 years ago)
3. when you ask for utensils, they bring you a kitchen knife from the back room! No joke.
4. it costs half of what it does in the US
5. your children are greeted like royalty and a paper crown is placed on their heads as they enter
6. Happy Meals come with COKE only

In the Car

Much of our excitement thus far has been related to outings in the car. There are no words to provide categories for how different traffic is here.

Here's a little flavor though it's much less congested in this video than what we've experienced:

Note the parties: cars, trucks, buses, rickshaws, bicyclists, pedestrians (no right of way, actually more like a target). No lights. Aggression wins. Whew. I bring books to read to the kids and we have a CD player, too. Shae felt a little ill yesterday due to motion sickness...

Here are a few quotes from the kiddos:

MATTHEW:
"Let's find ANOTHER cow!"
"I hear a beep, beep!" (referring to constant horn honking)
"I hear a fireman."

HANNAH:
"It's a good thing we have a horn."
"It sounds like the cars are talking to each other."
"That's not safe." (referring to 9 men hanging off the back of a truck)
"Why doesn't she have a helmet, Mommy?"
"Grandma would freak out with this traffic, right, Mommy?" (Little ears don't miss a thing!)

Matthew singing, "Raju, raju, bo baju, banana fana fo faju, Raju"

Highlights from the first 24 hours

Some of the highlights I included in the last post...

Others include...
- Matthew losing his breakfast in the car a few minutes before we arrived at Palm Meadows (community where we'll be living). Fortunately, we were close and the family who we were visiting loaned us clothes (note to self: pack extras) and washed the carseat liner, etc.

- REMARKABLE driving ability of Mr. Raju, our driver. Unreal traffic. It's interesting to entrust yourself to someone else's care so fully. I am grateful that we won't be driving and grateful to entrust ourselves to such a competent and kind person. He helped Matthew ride a bike this afternoon and helps both kids in and out of their carseats.

- Compliments from 3 women (2 shopkeepers and a friend's cook): "You have very nice height, madam!" I thanked them but admitted I didn't have much to do with that. The cook replied, smiling, "Yes, God's creation."

- NOTE: SORRY TO SAY WE WON'T BE ABLE TO POST ANY PHOTOS UNTIL LATER THIS WEEK WHEN THE COMPUTER/CAMERA CORD ARRIVES IN THE AIR SHIPMENT

Time to charge the computer...

Arrived Safely in Bangalore

Just a quick note to say we arrived safely in Bangalore!

THANK YOU for your many prayers for us. There were many traveling mercies.

We are all doing well considering we traveled for 27 hours (of which the kids slept maybe 5). There were some challenging points, but it wasn't nearly as bad as it could have been.

So much to say...

- I am touched and grateful for the kind reception we receive almost everywhere we go. H & M are quite an attraction, esp. side by side in the double stroller in the airport. There were many waves, smiles, and kind hellos--a very kid-friendly place. Such a delight to a mother.

- We were met at 2:00am at the airport by our driver, Raju, who was such a welcome sight. He had a bouquet of roses and was so happy to meet the rest of the family (after having met Shae in Dec.).

- Hannah has declared that she wishes she could live in India forever. As we left the airport, she said, "Look, Mommy! Those flowers are REAL!" She loves the warm weather and wearing summer clothes. She's on the balcony right now, "feeling the warm air."

- Matthew is in a bubble bath (for the last 20 minutes) after a nice swim (splashing of feet) in the freezing pool. He just got out saying, "I want to swim the pool AGAIN!" He and Hannah cut quite the figure with their sunglasses and pool attire. Now he's trying to get my attention: "Hey Lisa!"

When we told the kids we were going to eat breakfast, Hannah said, "But who will cook?" Oh the joys of hotel life! :) They loved breakfast at the outdoor cafe of the hotel; Hannah is amazed by the different plants and flowers.

Things are getting crazier as kids have emerged from respective corners... hope to write more soon!