Patting myself on the back... and missing you all

This weekend I made eggnog. And it tasted pretty much like eggnog!

(I made a cooked version to ensure the health of my family.)

Most of our expat friends have returned to their home countries or are traveling over this holiday season. And many Indian friends travel or host family in this season, too. We're feeling a little homesick these oddly warm days. :) We are really looking forward to a visit from my bro and his lovely wife after Christmas.

We know you are all busy in this season; it's been good to have a radically less busy Advent season... we don't miss the hustle and bustle of shopping, etc. But we do miss you! If you have a chance to give us a ring or send us a line... our US phone # is still 612-866-1524 (11.5 hours ahead of Mpls, 10.5 CO), we would love to hear from you. Or email is great, too. :)

In Christmas love,
Lisa

Matthew singing

Christmas at the kids' school

Waiting for Santa to arrive...

 

Santa... wearing a slightly scary mask

 

Matthew signing with his classmates

 

Hannah receiving her gift from Santa

 

Preview... Shae's back from Nepal!

 

 

 

 

Quotes of the recent weeks

+ Hannah upon being told about going to a new school: "It's okay, Mommy. I'm brave!" (What a delight to hear this from her. She has weathered a lot of transitions and it hasn't been easy for her... or me. She is growing! I am proud! And a side note: the kids have loved their first 2 days at school. So glad for this.)

+ Raju, our driver, after drinking the customary late afternoon tea in the kitchen while I feed 2 testy children, "I am learning maintenance of children, Madam." (I think he meant discipline. :))

+ Matthew: "The mosquito came and bited me because he thought I was dessert!" Yes, that boy is sweet.

+ Matthew upon seeing a sleeping cat spring to his feet: "That cat was pretending it was 7:00!" (the hour at which when they're allowed to come downstairs for breakfast).

+ Rani, our house helper: "You are having a boy, madam. That's why you look dull. With girls we look more beautiful. Ellen Madam (my sister) must be having a girl."

+ Kaplana, cook, telling Rani about my youngest sister, Amy. "She is VERY beautiful." Rani: "asldkjfalskdjfalskdjf (Kannada) asdfasdfa, Madam" Kalpana: "Yes, Madam is pretty. But her sister is VERY, SO REALLY pretty." (Can't deny that one! I love you, beautiful Amers!)

Christmas Photo Greeting 2009

Make a Smilebox greeting

My cheesy cookie decorating elves

 

 

 

 

Things I am grateful for

Just wanted to share a few things I'm grateful for...

1. Spots for both the kids opened at the school nearby (have been on the waiting list for 10 months)! They start there on Wednesday. This is wonderful because it's a better option in so many ways. There are lots of families in our community with kids there.

2. Merry Christmas to me! I bought an oven. A real one. Though I am rather proud of the stunts I pulled off with our toaster oven (3 birthday cakes, many rounds of muffins, cookies--6 at a time, etc.), I am extremely glad to have a larger one for holiday baking and more. It's in the laundry room and I can use either the washer OR the oven, but I am happy to put laundry on hold.

3. I had a great appointment with an OB who's very nearby. She is from India and has recently returned after being trained and working in the UK for years. She is excellent, competent, and pleasant. She answered all my questions, reviewed my US charts and made pertinent observations. I am so grateful and relieved.

4. Felt the delight of the baby moving for the first time.

Thanks for sharing my joys.

Advent in India

I am aware that it's only December 7th and my thoughts may change as Christmas nears and as friends leave. But for now, I have to say we have really enjoyed Advent here.

Living in a predominantly Hindu culture, we are really responsible for our own celebration of Advent and Christmas. It's been a good exercise in intention and also an opportunity to strengthen our traditions without the onslaught of commercial American Christmas and the general busyness of the festive season. We're enjoying our Jesse Tree advent wreath, lighting the candles and reading together each morning as that's our family time together. It's been easier to do this consistently as other years have found us busy with evening activities.

We've loved reading all our Christmas books and listening to Christmas music.

We are grateful for the loan of a small, lit Christmas tree! And decorations for it (from another family!), too. I brought decor but didn't bring a tree or ornaments. I am so glad for these loans.

At the same time, it feels odd to wear flip flops and sleep with the windows open... to feel no climatic indication of seasonal change. It's odd to eat gingerbread in 75 degree weather. Don't get me wrong; the climate here is lovely and comfortable. But we do miss the seasonality, the change in foods, the change in light... snow... and fellowship with you, our dear friends and family.

Will send out a digital card soon... and would LOVE to receive your cards. If you need our address, please email me. It is a huge boost to receive mail from home.

p.s. Though most (read: all) foreigners around here head home for the winter holidays, we'll be in Bangalore through Christmas and then travel east to the beach, joined by my brother and sister-in-law.

Train trip to Mangalore

Shae and Hannah went to a Target employee's wedding in Mangalore a few weeks ago. Matthew and I stayed home as we were recovering from nasty colds and a sinus infection. It was an overnight (11 hour) trip there and then an 11-hour daytime trip to return. The city of Mangalore is due west of Bangalore on the coast. Hannah loved the wedding, saying that seeing the bride was the highlight. She also enjoyed the beach and special time with Daddy.

The photos show the beautiful foliage and terrain of the Western Ghats (mountains), my crazy husband letting my daughter lean off of the platform, the toilet, a train that perished at the bottom of a ravine.

Hannah's End-of-the-Year Ballet Show

Here are some shots from Hannah's ballet show. She LOVES to dance. At this point, it's the fun of the tutu, the music and the pinkness. She had a wonderful time and her brother was pretty cute in the audience.

Indian finery

This is the saree I bought to attend a wedding last month. Sadly, I wasn't able to go, but finally tried it on (mostly for you, Mom :)).

Will post some photos of Shae & Hannah's train trip to the wedding soon.

 

 

 

 

Fauna in the neighborhood...

 

 

Snakes in India

Snakes have been on my mind recently. We see them occasionally. A water snake (not poisonous) was caught in a neighbor's garden across the street last week. A cobra was caught on the driveway of the kids' school several weeks ago. Saw a snake slither across an empty lot yesterday. The photos in the adjoining post are from another Target family who lives 1 street away... this snake was found in their garage in October. I have been very wary of entering our garage since. Apparently, though, snakes come in only during certain seasons (monsoon, when eggs hatch, etc.). Still, I'm not terribly reassured. Many people living nearer to water or with big gardens find them in their homes occasionally. Happily, we are in neither category.

What's been interesting is the response of people here to snakes.

Snakes are considered good luck and are actively worshiped in Hinduism.

An excerpt from Wikipedia:
Snake worship refers to the high status of snakes or (nagas) in Hindu mythology. Nāga (Sanskrit:नाग) is the Sanskrit and Pāli word for a deity or class of entity or being, taking the form of a very large snake, found in Hinduism and Buddhism. The use of the term nāga is often ambiguous, as the word may also refer, in similar contexts, to one of several human tribes known as or nicknamed "Nāgas"; to elephants; and to ordinary snakes, particularly the King Cobra and the Indian Cobra, the latter of which is still called nāg in Hindi and other languages of India. A female nāga is a nāgī. The Snake primarily represents rebirth, death and mortality, due to its casting of its skin and being symbolically "reborn". Over a large part of India there are carved representations of cobras or nagas or stones as substitutes. To these human food and flowers are offered and lights are burned before the shrines. Among the Dravidians a cobra which is accidentally killed is burned like a human being; no one would kill one intentionally. The serpent-god's image is carried in an annual procession by a celibate priestess.

Another informative site:
http://hubpages.com/hub/THE-SNAKE-GODS-OF-HINDUISM

Thanksgiving in India!

We had 2 Thanksgiving celebrations this year: one with Target folks at a hotel restaurant on Thursday (ate outside!), and another in a friend's home with other American families and a family from the UK who'd lived in the US for many years and had come to love our Yankee tradition.

We have felt homesick this week! And sad to miss a 4-day stretch of holiday, too. It felt odd.

Yet, we are more mindful this year than ever of all we have to be thankful for. We made a "thankful tree", cutting out leaves and writing what we were thankful for on each one before pasting them to our "tree". Things like "access to clean water" made the list this year. Among Matthew's leaves: "pizza and ice cream."

Thanksgiving culinary endeavors required great creativity. After a pilot run with a butter pie crust that was too tough, I tracked down "granulated vegetable ghee"--the closest thing to shortening in the country. It worked. Even in my toaster oven.

I googled "sweet potato" for an image to show our driver and then found the word in Kannada (genasu). He found some for us at a local market. I hadn't seen them anywhere in stores but heard they were sold somewhere here. More like a yam, but pretty tasty roasted with onions, garlic and herbs.

Craisins can be rehydrated with water, red wine, orange zest and corn starch; they evolved into an edible cranberry relish.

One point of failure, however... "fresh cream" in India does not whip into anything resembling what we put on pie. Alas, we indulged in the twice-the-price imported squirt whip cream from France. The meal was redeemed for Hannah and Shae.

Below are a few photos of our gathering at a friend's home... lots of delicious home-cooked food, a well-prepared turkey from an Italian restaurant that imported them from the US, and lots of kids, too!

Celebrating Kalpana's birthday

The kids and I made a little cake to celebrate our cook, Kalpana's, birthday. As per usual Indian fashion, she doesn't smile directly into the camera, but I caught her sweet smile in action shots. We are blessed to have her in our home.

 

 

 

 

Not in Kansas anymore

 

Mystery fruit #13

What's your best guess?

 

"Functioning Anarchy"

Just read this description of India ("functioning anarchy") and it couldn't been more fitting. It was how John Kenneth Galbraith, U.S. ambassador to New Delhi in early 1960’s described the country.

If you have ANY interest in reading about India, I have to HIGHLY recommend a book I've mentioned before by Edward Luce: In Spite of the Gods, The Rise of Modern India. It's fascinating and brilliant. Check it out from the library and just read the last chapter if that's all you care to. Among the many reasons I loved it, the first chapter is entitled: “Global and Medieval: India’s Schizophrenic Economy”. He captures the contrasts and contradictions of this remarkable country in an astounding way.

He chronicles the rise of India, the many and major challenges it faces, and ends by suggesting opportunities for growth and change.

Here are a few highlights about some of the massive problems in India: (the examples and statistics help me to get my head around the size of the problem)

Education: “According to India’s government, on any given day one-third of teachers are absent from government schools. In the state of Bihar… less than 3% of government schools have electricity and less than 20% have toilets for their teachers. Only a few schools have separate toilets for girls.” (248)

Infrastructure: “Uttar Pradesh has among the worst highways in India. So potholed are they that most of the stat’s villages cannot get their farm surplus to market. Kutcha (substandard) roads are one of the main reasons that only 2% of Indian’s farm output has any value added to it beyond being harvested, or milked. More than a third of India’s vegetables and fruit rot before arriving at market. “ (88)

Aborting girls: “…India has an estimated 40 to 50 million ‘missing girls.’ ... In some parts of the state [Gujarat] the ratio is below 800 girls to 1000 boys. Families in the worst-affected districts are importing girls from other parts of India to serve as brides to several husbands at once—usually the unfortunate woman is shared between 3 or 4 brothers.” (319)

Luce suggests that to overcome poverty, India must establish better economic climate for farmers and create more jobs in manufacturing and services: “The problem is neither money nor technology. It is about the efficiency of government.” (338)

My FAVORITE description of the government:
“”If you were to assess India’s economic situation by walking its corridors of power, it would be impossible to guess the country was going through a software revolution. Instead of computers you have armies of men shuffling paper. Instead of vacuum cleaners you have lower-caste sweepers carefully reshuffling the dust beneath your feet. As a substitute for a specific appointment, you are told: ‘Just come.’ Yes, but at what time? ‘Don’t worry. Just come.’ In place of waiting rooms, you have queues of supplicants spilling over into the corridors and the courtyards outside, each hoping to snatch a moment with the VIP whose mere word or signature can put an end to a hundred sleepless nights and a thousand wasted phone calls. Instead of servants—civil or otherwise—you have masters.” (63-4)

Most complicated tax system in the world. “In some parts of India, the system of octroi—a tax levied on the passage of goods from one Indian state to another—costs more to administer than it collects. Corruption is the only possible explanation for why it has been kept in place.” (340)


Obviously, there are many more issues (poverty, child labor, HIV/AIDS, etc.) but I didn't want to write all night. :) Thanks for reading this much.

Interesting Article

This is a really interesting(and not too long) article in the NYT about the shortage of coconut pickers in Kerala (state to the SW of us). Great photos and interesting commentary on societal change.

http://www.nytimes.com/2009/11/18/world/asia/18india.html

p.s. to "Baffle" post

Shae told me later that at the FRO office there was a cockroach running around the desk of one of the officials signing his paperwork. The official ignored it. Just thought I should add that flourishing touch! :)

Things that baffle us

Multiple times a week we say to ourselves, "WHERE ARE WE LIVING????"

It's a statement of disbelief. Disbelief at how deeply dysfunctional things seem to us, yet how they continue to function. Traffic. Bribes. Corruption. Bureaucracy. The way people treat one another. The caste system.

This week's highlights:

1. A local fireworks shop is going out of business so it decided to shoot off its remaining inventory... all night long.

2. We just went through the laborious procedures involved in visa renewal, only to find out that our kids' visas have been extended for 1 year (process done in Bangalore), but ours were only granted a 3-month extension (process done in Chennai). This is just a blatant, manipulative way to get us to come and pay more money. The truly frustrating thing: each renewal takes at least 12 (TWELVE) hours of Shae's time away from the office.

And his colleague who renewed the same week? He was granted a 6-month extension. Arbitrary?

Sorry for griping. Just had to share some of the baffling things in our world.

An Art Party with Friends

Can't believe we have a 5 year old!!!

 

 

 

 

What change looks like

 

When the shop doesn't have enough change, they give you "penny" candy to fill in the difference.

Ooty with Mom!

We had a wonderful time with my mom here. Her short visit flew by, but it was so sweet. After a few days in Bangalore, we drove (8 hours) to a famous hill station for a weekend away. It was a world away--high hills/mountains, chilly mornings and evenings, lots of mostly fresh air. The last part of the drive included 36 hairpin turns (signs photographed for your viewing pleasure); Hannah called them "hair clip turns". :) Matthew loved saying "Ooty!"

The photos are in 2 slideshows: the first is the drive (part of it through a wildlife preserve), the setting and lunch at one of Shae's team member's (Target speak for coworker) homes. The second is the amazing botanical gardens, a highlight of our trip. The high altitude yielded an amazing combination of cool weather and tropical plants. We loved the amazing variety!






Not shown is the train trip we didn't get to take because tickets were sold out after waiting in line for 45 mins (wrong information from guide book and hotel concierge). Also not shown, the "scenic" viewpoint--the highest peak in southern India--from which you could see trash, more trash, pollution and way too many people. Didn't even take the camera out. Sad.

Taking things for granted

India will cure you of that.

1. Had 2 dr. appts canceled today. "Not possible today, madam"

+ Am grateful for (and missing) the world where receptionists do more than schedule appointments. Grateful for nurse triage lines that give you information and call you back.

2. Had to go to the local police station to start Visa renewal process (employment visas are generally only granted for 1 year at a time). Arrived on time for our appt and were accompanied by an agent from a company Target uses to help us navigate these things. Sadly, our "guide" arrived just after another (much more important) person (some lady taking bribes to do job placements, I think) was escorted into the office with TV cameras, etc. Big news. Once the fanfare cleared, the commissioner looked briefly at all our carefully assembled documents, asked us the same questions a few times, and grunted importantly, but he deigned not to sign or stamp (would have required 30 seconds, max) that evening, and told us to come back another time instead. Also, observed a lovely bribe taking place behind a police vehicle 5 feet from us. Literally saw an argument, the parties moved to a more discreet location, then saw the exchange of money and people left.

+ Grateful for a system where there is at least MORE order, justice, civility. Where appointments are kept, procedures completed, power plays minimized. Bribes not required.

Dressed for Diwali

Here's my handsome crew:

Jet lag and Tinker Toys

The first day back we arrived at 3am, came home and crashed. After a nap in the afternoon, we roused the kids and tried to feed them a snack before going to the pool. The were both LITERALLY sleeping in their food 3 minutes later.

Hannah's tall tinker toy creation: The Leaning Tower of Pisa :)

Out of the mouth of babes: Hannah... and an announcement

(In my past life, this would be on the blog about the funny things our kids say. In the effort to simplify, everything shows up here now. :))

Hannah and Matthew were playing with their plastic dinosaurs and got a hold of my favorite beaded bracelet. They stretched it out around the dinos' necks and now it's too big to wear. When I asked them about it, Hannah said:

1. "Don't worry, Mommy, you have other bracelets."
2. "There's a shop in Minneapolis where you can get it fixed."
3. "Well, your wrists are going to get bigger!" (True, we are expecting #3 in May, and everything will be getting a bit bigger. :))

Cultural currency

During Diwali (festival of lights) it's customary to give gifts (often sweets) and customary for employers to give bonuses (to their Hindu employees--the others get bonuses on their major religious holidays).

We gave our driver, Raju, a big bonus (more than his monthly salary) to thank him for his excellent work for us. He showed us the next day that he'd spent it (and more) on a gold ring with some small diamonds for himself. This is interesting to us... jewelry is definitely a status symbol here. Gold, especially. I guess we were hoping that he would save some (seems to be a pretty foreign concept among working class folks), thinking of his daughter's future, etc. On the other hand, gold is often sold back or exchanged for other things. At times like this, we feel the depth of our cultural differences.

Back to India after a Quick Trip to the US

We've been out of the blogging loop after an all-too-short trip back to the US. We've emerged from the fog of jet lag, traveled to a nearby (?) (8 hour journey) hill station with my mom, bid her goodbye (sob), and are settling back into life here.

I didn't mean to start off on a negative note with the first two posts about cockroaches (in the Tgt cafeteria's food) and crazy roads. Those two items jumped out in the haze of jet=lag, reminding us we are back in INDIA, not "Kansas" anymore.

We were also welcomed warmly by friends here and delighted to leave snow for this balmy clime.

Lots of photos to come,
Lisa

On the road

All these photos were taken from the front seat (passenger's side :))...

To be fair, I will note that we were out of the city for part of the trip (note oxen being washed in a mud hole, women washing and drying clothes in small lake).

The last shots of the rocks lining the paved side of the road: the rocks were placed BY HAND for kilometer after kilometer to keep people from driving until that side had settled and was paved.

Yep, we're back in India

From: Ambiga.S
Sent: Monday, October 12, 2009 11:07 AM
To: Sanjeev.N
Cc: Shae.M; Raveesh.R; Roopa.R; Shalini.Ba
Subject: Cockroach in Food



Hi Sanjeev,



I found a cockroach in today’s breakfast(Sambar) and this is the 3rd time I am finding it.



And it was not just me, Shalini & Roopa have also experienced the same a couple of times.



And I have also informed Raveesh regarding the same.



Regards

Ambiga
--------------
From: Sanjeev.N
Sent: Monday, October 12, 2009 11:24 AM
To: Ambiga.S
Cc: Shae.M; Raveesh.R; Roopa.R; Shalini.Ba; Praveen.G
Subject: RE: Cockroach in Food



Hi,



First and foremost my sincere regrets for the experience you have gone through. I will get this investigated through my team and will ensure this is not repeated in future.



Praveen - Take this up with the vendor and let them know that their services will be terminated in this is repeated even once in future



With Regards,



Sanjeev N

No caption needed

 

 

 

Matthew's class roster

Vaishnavi
Vidit
Asmitha
Avni
Willi
Paul
Neha
Ramya
Rishit
Kritik
Ranveer
Vriddhi
Vishwa
Matthew

Yes, I still have to ask him sometimes if he's talking about a girl or a boy when he shares about his friends from school. :)

Around the yard

I don't have to resort to our daily newspaper for images that blow your mind.

This is how the grass is mowed here. No joke. Then swept up by other workers.

And it's not just our tiny lawn. It's every manicured green space in the city. Thousands upon thousands of people squat and cut grass by hand every day. Still learning more about it, but I know in part it's a caste thing. Blows my mind.

 

 

 

 

Divas dining out

 

What started with a night out with friends for my birthday a few months ago has blossomed into a monthly gathering of mom friends dining out. Here's a shot from our latest outing. It's been great!